You know what I feel lately, that I don’t have a part in your life again. It’s like a piece of cherished furniture kept in a special corner of the house.
But you see, that doesn’t work well for me.
I understand you’re busy, and believe me, I do. Currently negotiating the route not to get into burn out street. Lol, so trust me, I know work pressure. I can’t fathom yours, so I don’t pretend to be in your shoes.
But hey, there’s life apart from that. And if I’m part of it, there’s some due for me.
Who am I to you? I understand I’m not priority to you. That’s not bad. But being very low on the ladder hurts to know. You could prioritise work, and be bent on following it to to the letter, but I think you’re overpushing it. I am patient and understanding and you’re abusing it.
I ask that you communicate well before you act. That’s not so big a request. That’s just about me being part of your life. I’ve not even touched the area of you being part of my life. Do you know what my life is today? What my joys are, what my struggles are? What my aspirations are?
We’re supposed to be living our lives together, despite the distance, trying to bridge the gap, make it work. Are we? Can we honestly say we are?.
I honestly an not comfortable living like this. It wears me out emotionally.
And I try not to react the way you act. Sometimes I just can’t help it. I want you to know I’m around when you wake up, so I’ll try to wish you a good morning. I want you to simulate my being close to you throughout the day, so I wish you a blissful day and check in when possible to see how far. I want you to think of me when going to bed, so I’d wish you a blissful night.
And then when that cycle breaks because of a reason or the other, for a lengthy period of time, imbalance sets in. This thing is about commitment. Not about ability or wish. It’s a choice.
And to say I watch, and wait, and check if you’re online, seen my chat or replied it. Yes. You see it. You view my status, but put the reply for later. Sometimes the next day.
And when Next or when later, you expect it to be same. What happened? I just wonder how long it takes to say good morning; Or good night.
Or that if really you cared, you’d be so busy as to forget to ask how I am whereas you’re visible online. I don’t think it takes so much time.
But I understand. It’s about priority. It’s about choice. So I have a question.
Do you see a future of us together? Or when do you intend to look into that future and tell me what you see?
I’ve been waiting for you to bring it to the table, but you’re very busy with other important stuff these days. I understand.
But last, was January. Then June, and now it’s August. It may soon be October and then December and then 2019 is off. So please, tell me here and now, today. No later pls.😔